QUICK TWITT: War Machine details life in prison

November 21, 2014 12:53 pm by BJPENN.COM News

war MAchine

War Machine is currently incarcerated during the course of an ongoing trial as a result of numerous charges from his assault on Christy Mack in August.

During his prison time War Machine has released several extended Tweets, detailing his time in prison.

Below is the most recent message released by the former Bellator MMA star.

11/14/14
I had gotten lost in the little bubble of a world that is my cell, nothing is real in here, I’m safe. Books, honey buns, and what type of dessert will they shove through the slot in my door along with dinner? I had my pre-lim today, however, which reminded me that I am NOT safe, not even close. I didn’t want to leave the safety of my bubble, if only I could just stay in here, maybe the nightmare will eventually go away? I’ve never been so nervous in all my life, why has my life led to this? When she testifies against me, helping the state to take away my LIFE, I curse her inwardly. When I see her cry, when I see the one I loved in pain…I fight my shackles in my mind, I fight everyone and everything barring me from comforting her with an embrace. Can you imagine the extent to which I’m torn? I wish I could write as freely as I’d like to, my soul yearns to be heard. I’m nauseous, I think I’ll be nauseous forever. I want to smash my face-in, I need a release from this pain, but that freedom is denied to me here. They’ll lock my ass back in he psych ward, butt naked and cold, for that. I’m sure they’ll even utilize those straps I saw, tie me down to the bed. My heart is beating oddly, stress. What I wouldn’t give for a time machine…what a waste of energy, those types of thoughts. But, what else can you do when your life had been flipped upside down? I’m in so much pain. I hate the black-and-white of it all, it leaves no room for the truth. One side lies to make their “truth” perfect and then the other side follows. When is ANYTHING ever so cut-and-dry? Truth is somewhere in the middle, always is. I came over 12 hours or so early, as a SURPRISE, so, since she was in bed with another man, “I did not have permission” to enter the house, but, had she been alone, then it’d have been a nice surprise, and me coming home early would have been ok? Why does THAT one lie have to be told, that one little lie? On the stand she admitted that she loved me and wanted to get married…but, I wasn’t allowed to come over as I pleased? That makes no sense. I hate the court’s involvement, I wish that we could talk as humans, I wish that I could give apologies where they’re due. I wish that I could hear her apologize as well, I need it, we both need it. God, today sucked, and this shit isn’t even over yet. My life feels like it’s over though, I feel hopeless. I keep waiting to wake-up from the horrible nightmare, any second…but this fucking mess is as real as it gets. I feel like puking, I feel like crying, but what good would it do? What good will anything do? I once had the best life Eva, only for a moment, perhaps, but is had it…I had it.

Tags: , , , , ,

About BJPENN.com

Shouted out after victory to the UFC masses, BJPENN.COM is the home to multiple time champion BJ Penn. After a decade of on-line operation BJPENN.COM has evolved into the most reliable destination for all your fighter interviews, fighter blogs and MMA/UFC news stories.

Advertise with us

For all advertising inquiries click here.

About us

Please contact us for all website inquiries.